I told him I was really busy with work. It was after all tax season, what did he expect. He was forewarned. I hadn't seen him since January 22 or so. His birthday was on Valentine's day and we had already made plans to celebrate it together by seeing the movie Valentine's Day. I text him to find out if we were still on. Secretly hoping we were not. He text me back saying he already had plans. Not a problem. Now I get to spend the day with the men I really love and care for, my two sons.
I took Migui, Javi and his girlfriend out to eat at Maggiano's. We all enjoyed the meal and conversation. It was a family style meal and there were enough leftovers to feed Javi, his girlfriend and Migui for 2-3 days.
OK back to Mr. Yelly Pottymouth. He called a few more times and left messages inviting me here or there. I was way too busy. Then when I finally answered one of his calls, I could hear it in his voice. He got it. I still wasn't gonna do it though. I let him know I was swamped and stressed out but didn't want to neglect him. I asked if he wanted me to try to make it down to hang out with him on the weekend. He said I was much too busy and should stay here and take care of my business and that he understood it was tax season. Then one evening out of the blue, while I was visiting my friend M'Lu, he started interrogating me. He was asking how could I possibly have that much work and didn't I tell him the deadline was 2 days ago. I found myself explaining that no matter the deadline, if the work wasn't done, I had to keep working on it until it was. Then deal with the consequences of submitting the quarterlies late. M'Lu was looking at me mouthing "hang up! Why is he yelling at you?" Not 15 minutes earlier M'Lu and I were discussing the fact that I couldn't keep avoiding him, even if I was swamped. Good grief do you blame me for not wanting to deal with him.
I was eventually going to have do the breaking up. This guy was just going to continue to be rude and yell at me as long as I let it continue. I really was busy with taxes and came home too tired to return his calls. Finally I called him back. He wasn't picking up or returning my calls or texts. So I stopped. Then one day, around the 28th of February, he sends me an email saying that he cannot continue to date me. (Whew!) The reason he gave in the email was: I was a girl who's trying to get back on her feet after a divorce without the support of her family and that my family was too dysfunctional. (WTF???) He had never met my family and whether or not I had my family's support did not affect him in the least. He even went so far as to tell me I needed to pay him back for gifts he had given me and my son for Christmas. What an ARCE! He is so delusional. Didn't matter though, desired outcome attained. I did pay him for the DSi he bought Migui for Christmas. I honestly hope he is still going to counseling... He doesn't even see that he has anger issues or OCD. His last girlfriend, his parents and siblings all know he's OCD with anger issues and warned me as soon as they got the chance. I pray for him, as does M'Lu
Well with Mr. Pottymouth out of the picture, I started going out again with my girlfriends. I met an older gentleman who was an Electrician. He turned out to be a grouchy old geezer and we never even made it out on a date. Then I met a 42 year old guy at Coffee Bean who was very Christian and a gentleman. We text and talked on the phone for a few days then met for coffee. When we met for coffee. I got their first. I got a bottle of water and waited in my car. When he got their, we decided to sit and talk in my car. We talked for hours. We people watched and finally watched as they closed Coffee Bean. It was a great conversation. We hit all the taboo subjects, politics, sex, religion, ex's and everything in between. And then he did it... Yes boys and girls he asked it, my pet peeve. The dreaded, 'can I kiss you?' but he put a twist on it. He asked after he did it. A girlfriend has a favorite saying, 'It's easier to ask for forgiveness than permission.' Apparently it was his motto. No matter, because when he left, he came around to my door, opened it and pulled me out for another kiss. It was then that I realized he was shorter than I and had a tiny frame. Good grief I may snap him in two in the heat of passion. lol He text me shortly after to let me know how very much he enjoyed the kiss. We text back and forth a few times. He had an athletic build, just on a tiny frame.
I wasn't too into him. Quite frankly, I was surprised that he seemed so into me. I didn't feel the chemistry. He started referring to me as amor in his texts. He was sweet. We spoke often text more. Nothing was going to come of it. I couldn't even imagine us as a couple. Then to my surprise, after several text asking me to call him, he called. I had to let it go to voice mail. On my way home, I checked my voice mail. He had let me know that he didn't feel chemistry and didn't want to drag it out any longer. He was so classy in how he said it and did it, I had to return the call. I got his voice mail. I left a message telling him I did get the message, no worries, and thanked him for being such a gentleman. The next day while with a client I got a call from him, but again had to let it go to voice mail. On my way home I retrieved my messages (yes I have a Bluetooth) and he simply said 'Classy lady, please call me.' I did. He told me that he appreciated the fact that I didn't call him names or go crazy or turn on the bitch mode because he told the truth. I told him I appreciated the fact that he tried to actually call and speak to me directly instead of texting what he had to say. We spoke for a good hour and left it at that. I went home with a smile on my face with the knowledge that there still are gentlemen out there that are responsible, don't yell, name call or act a fool.
I have many guy friends and I hear them talk about breaking up with women or even just getting them angry. The general consensus is that women freak out if you break up with them even if they want to break up too. It's these bitches that give the rest of us a bad name! I know I don't want to have to be the one to do the breaking up. It just sucks. Sometimes you just know. Like if two people super glue the tips of their index fingers together, you know the one with the thicker skin is gonna be alright. It's the same in relationships. There is usually an inequality in the degree of feeling each individual feels for the other. One loves the other just a tad more. They are the ones who get the tip of their index finger ripped off and it remains raw until it heals. On occasion it gets picked at and never really heals well. Love, I believe is about compromise, however the key is to be willing to compromise anything but yourself. If you are in a relationship and can maintain the essence of you, you're on the right track. Many people change for their partner, some forever not for better. That reminded me of 'In My Life' by the Beatles. Yes I'm such a Beatles fan...
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